Thursday, January 31, 2013

Friday, January 25, 2013

Condom

In a New York sidewalk, an Indian was enjoying a hearty breakfast " Coffee, croissants, toast, butter, jam, etc

While an American, chewing a gum, sat next to him and started an unwanted conversation

American: You Indians eat the whole bread?

Indian: Of course!

American: (Blowing bubbles with his gum) we don't. We, Americans only Eat what's inside.

The crust we collect in a container, recycle, make these into croissants
and sell these to the Indians.

American: Do you eat jam with bread?

Indian: Of course!

American: (Chuckling and crackling his gum between his teeth) we don't.

Americans eat fruits at breakfast, put all the peels, seeds and leftovers into containers, turn these into jam and sell it to Indians.

Indian: Do you have sex in America?

American: Of course, we do!

Indian: What do you do with the condoms?

American: We throw them, of course!

Indian : We don't. In India, we put them into containers, recycle them, turn them into chewing gums and sell it to America

Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Golfer jokes

Two women were playing golf. One teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole. The ball hit one of the men.

He immediately clasped his hands together at his groin, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in agony.

The woman rushed down to the man, and immediately began to apologize. 'Please allow me to help. I'm a Physical Therapist and I know I could relieve your pain if you'd allow me, she told him.

'Oh, no, I'll be all right. I'll be fine in a few minutes,' the man replied. He was in obvious agony, lying in the fetal position, still clasping his hands there at his groin.

At her persistence, however, he finally allowed her to help. She gently took his hands away and laid them to the side, loosened his pants and put her hands inside. She administered tender and artful massage for several long moments and asked, 'How does that feel'?

He replied, 'It feels great, but I still think my thumb is broken!'

Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Monday, January 14, 2013

Wow

"A man sat at a metro station in Washington DC and started to play the violin; it was a cold January morning. He played six Bach pieces for about 45 minutes. During that time, since it was rush hour, it was calculated that 1,100 people went through the station, most of them on their way to work.

Three minutes went by, and a middle aged man noticed there was musician playing. He slowed his pace, and stopped for a few seconds, and then hurried up to meet his schedule.

A minute later, the violinist received his first dollar tip: a woman threw the money in the till and without stopping, and continued to walk.

A few minutes later, someone leaned against the wall to listen to him, but the man looked at his watch and started to walk again. Clearly he was late for work.

The one who paid the most attention was a 3 year old boy. His mother tagged him along, hurried, but the kid stopped to look at the violinist. Finally, the mother pushed hard, and the child continued to walk, turning his head all the time. This action was repeated by several other children. All the parents, without exception, forced them to move on.

In the 45 minutes the musician played, only 6 people stopped and stayed for a while. About 20 gave him money, but continued to walk their normal pace. He collected $32. When he finished playing and silence took over, no one noticed it. No one applauded, nor was there any recognition.

No one knew this, but the violinist was Joshua Bell, one of the most talented musicians in the world. He had just played one of the most intricate pieces ever written, on a violin worth $3.5 million dollars.

Two days before his playing in the subway, Joshua Bell sold out at a theater in Boston where the seats averaged $100.

This is a real story. Joshua Bell playing incognito in the metro station was organized by the Washington Post as part of a social experiment about perception, taste, and priorities of people. The outlines were: in a commonplace environment at an inappropriate hour: Do we perceive beauty? Do we stop to appreciate it? Do we recognize the talent in an unexpected context?

One of the possible conclusions from this experience could be:

If we do not have a moment to stop and listen to one of the best musicians in the world playing the best music ever written, how many other things are we missing?"

Share and spread it :)

Sunday, January 13, 2013

PSYCHOLOGY AND LAW.....student

A guy asked a girl in a library: "Do you mind if I sit beside you?"

The girl replied with a loud voice: "I DON'T WANT TO SPEND THE NIGHT WITH YOU!"

All the students in the library started staring at the guy, he was embarrassed. After a couple of minutes, the girl walked quietly to the guy's table and said: "I study psychology and I know what a man is thinking, I guess you felt embarrassed right?

The guy responded with a loud voice: $500 FOR ONE NIGHT? THAT'S TOO MUCH!

All the people in the library looked at the girl in shock. The guy whispered in her ears; "I study Law and I know how to make someone feel guilty."

Tuesday, January 8, 2013

Most Expensive Paintings in the World

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 




sheep higway

if we malaysian can be this discipline 

cool..need to tell my friends on this




hahaha nice one



Monday, January 7, 2013

Married couple

A couple was Christmas shopping at the mall on Christmas Eve and the mall was packed. As the wife walked through the mall she was surprised to look up and see her husband was nowhere around. She was quite upset because they had a lot to do.

Because she was so worried, she called him on his mobile phone to ask him where he was.

In a calm voice, the husband said, "Honey, you remember the jewelry store we went into about 5 years ago where you fell in love with that diamond necklace that we could not afford and I told you that I would get it for you one day?"

The wife choked up and started to cry and said, "Yes, I remember that jewelry store."

He said, "Well, I'm in the bar right next to it."