Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Cannibal man

Two Cannibals
Two cannibals, a father and son, were elected by the tribe to go out and get something to eat. They walked deep into the jungle and waited by a path.

Before long, along came this little old man. The son said, "Ooh dad, there's one." "No," said the father. "There's not enough meat on that one to even feed the dogs. We'll just wait."

Well, a little while later, along came this really
fat man. The son said, "Hey dad, he's plenty big enough." "No," the father said. "We'd all die of a heart attack from the fat in that one. We'll just wait."

About an hour later, here comes this absolutely gorgeous woman.

The son said, "Now there's nothing wrong with that one dad. Let's eat her."

"No," said the father. "We'll not eat her either."

"Why not?" asked the son.

"Because, we're going to take her back alive and eat your mother.

Mom and dad

A family is at the dinner table. The son asks his father, "Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?"

The father, surprised, answers, "Well, son, there are three kinds of boobs: In her 20's, a woman's are like melons, round and firm. In her 30's to 40's, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit. After 50, they are like onions."


"Yes, you see them and they make you cry."

his infuriated his wife and daughter so the daughter said, "Mum, how many kinds of 'willies' are there?"

The mother, surprised, smiles and answers, "Well dear, a man goes through three phases. In his 20's, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his 30's and 40's, it is like a birch, flexible but reliable. After his 50's, it is like a Christmas Tree."

"A Christmas tree?"

"Yes - the tree is dead and the balls are just for decoration."

Friday, September 21, 2012

How to Determine if an Egg is Fresh?

How to Determine if an Egg is Fresh?

Fill a container up with warm water. I use warm water. The reason for this is. Eggs are porous. If you put an egg in cold water, it will contract and draw any bacteria that is on the outside of the shell in through the pores.

This is not good. So, if you use warm water, the egg will expand, and you will notice that little air bubbles form on the shell.

Put your eggs into the warm water, and look at them.

A very fresh egg will sink to the bottom and lay on it's side.

Week old eggs will rest on the bottom but the fat end of the egg will rise up slightly.

Three week old eggs will be balanced on pointy end with the fat end sticking up.

Old eggs will be floating, bobbing along the surface of the water.

These floaters should be tossed as they aren't any good to eat.

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

9 Cara Bangkitkan Perasaan Gembira Saat Bekerja

9 Cara Bangkitkan Perasaan Gembira Saat Bekerja

Bukan mudah menciptakan ruang bahagia apabila tiba kepada kerja. Sebut sahaja kerja, mulalah rasa tekanan. Walau apa pun perasaan itu, sebagai pekerja, tanggungjawab itu perlu dipikul. Untuk merialisasikan cara kerja yang baik, perasaan ikhlas dan gembira perlu ada. Perbaharui minat dan rutin anda. Bagaimana? Ikuti panduan di bawah:

1. Perancangan
Stabilkan jadual masa anda. Baik untuk hujung minggu mahupun pada hari-hari biasa. Perancangan begini membolehkan anda mendapagkan minggu yang lebih produktif setiap masa.

Mulakan hari anda 15 minit lebih awal untuk membuat perancangan yang telah ditetapkan. Senaraikan tiga perkara paling penting perlu dilakukan untuk hari tertentu dan tetapkan matlamat anda. Fokus dan kecapinya!

2. Timbulkan persoalan
Sebaris ayat mampu mengubah segalanya. Lekatkan reminder pada tempat paling mudah untuk anda lihat dengan ayat "Adakah aku menggunakan masa yang ada dengan baik?"

3. Menerima kenyataan
Kesempurnaan adakalanya sukar dicapai. Terimalah kenyataan sekiranya perancangan anda tidak dapat dilaksanakan dengan baik. Jangan rosakan mood hanya kerana matlamat anda tidak tercapai. Sebaliknya, cuba usahakan perancangan seterusnya pula.

4. Tutup komputer anda!
Jangan salah sangka. Tutup komputer tidak bermakna anda tidak boleh melakukan kerja lagi. Beri masa jnguk masa anda rehat secukupnya untuk mengembalikan kesegaran. Peruntukkan masa untuk membuat kerja di dalam komputer supaya anda tidak kelihatan lesu.

5. Buka e-mail kemudian
Pada sesetengah orang, e-mail menjadi satu keutamaan dalam urusan kerja. Namun, jika tidak, hadkan penghantaran e-mail kurang dari lima penghantaran supaya anda tidak terlalu terikat dengan satu perkara sahaja.

6. Gugurkan perkara tidak penting!
Pasti di dalam senarai kerja anda ada perkara yang tidak penting. Gugurkan atau asingkanya.

7. Pilih kegembiraan
Untuk bekerja dengan lebih produktif, tidak semestinya anda perlu  serius sepanjang masa. Senyum tidak bermakna anda tidak berusaha keras. Ghairah bekerja tidak bermakna anda bukan seorang pesaing.

Berfikiran positif tidak bermakna anda takutkan cabaran. Pilih untuk berasa gembira sewaktu bekerja. Cari rakan yang anda boleh kongsi perasaan ini bersama agar perasaan gembira itu boleh tersebar. Elakkan gosip dan perbualan nagatif!

8. Kongsi pencapaian anda
Bukan untuk bermegah tetapi perkongsian mengenai kejayaan atau pencapaian anda bersama rakan sekerjz bukan hanya boleh menciptakan kebahagian kepada anda malah memberi motivasi kepada teman lain.

9. Berfikiran kreatif
Adakah kerjaya anda membosankan? Guna kreativiti anda mencari cara bagaimana untuk menambahkan keseronokan dalam tugasan anda. Mungkin anda boleh cuba mengubah ruti harian asalkan inputnya sama atau lebih produktif.

Tuesday, September 4, 2012

whale vommit

Boy Finds Ambergris, Valuable Fragrant Rock from Whale Poop, on Beach

A 200-year-old fragrance originally made for Marie Antoinette was reproduced in limited quantities a few years back, for a staggering $11,000 a bottle. The main ingredient was ambergris, a rare rocklike substance that exudes a special scent all its own. The best ambergris goes for $10,000 per pound, and one lucky 8-year-old in England has very likely stumbled upon a large piece on his local beach.
“Charlie and I were just out for a normal walk on our local beach, with the dog, when he found this waxy-looking rock,” Alex Naysmith, the boy’s father, told ABC News. “He’s always picking up stuff, and he was joking that it was really heavy. In fact, it was quite light and it reminded me of something I saw on the news that a New Zealand couple found.”
Naysmith said they took it home to Google what it was. Although only a local marine biologist in southern England has examined it so far, the strange-looking rock that Charlie picked up will likely fetch $65,000. And that’s not the best bit – ambergris, far from a French-sounding semi-precious rock, is actually whale feces.
“Headlines like ‘Moby Sick Makes Boy Rich’ reveal the popular misconception of ambergris as whale vomit. It’s poop,” Christopher Kemp, a molecular biologist told ABC News. Kemp is the author of the book “Floating Gold: the Natural (and Unnatural) History of Ambergris.” He dubbed the process of creating a chunk of ambergris, like the one Naysmith found, as “one unlikelihood piled on top of another,” saying that “only one percent of the 350,00 sperm whales can actually make it. Then once they excrete it, it has to float around the ocean for decades to be of any value.”
Naysmith told ABC News that their piece of ambergris “definitely looks like” it’s been floating around for years, and that he invites any experts to come and examine it definitively.
“You can’t tell by just looking at it. Sometimes it’s mistaken for animal fat, and the kid’s one could be that,” said Kemp. “But if it is real ambergris, because it’s so rare, it’s very valuable.”
According to scientists, when sperm whales dine on squid, they protect themselves by secreting a fatty substance in their intestines to surround the squid’s beaks. Eventually whales excrete these large lumps of ambergris, up to hundreds of pounds at a time.
Kemp said that each piece smells a bit different, and luxury perfumers say that the smallest amount makes the biggest difference to a given fragrance.
“One drop of ambergris can change a perfume,” Claire Payne, an aroma therapist and perfumer told ABC News. “It’s what we call an animalic smell, different to the citrusy or fruity scents. It’s like musk, and we use it in several of our fragrances,” she added.
Ambergris has a scent all its own—derived from its chemical component ambrein—that it imparts to popular perfumes such as Chanel No. 5. It’s often described as an odd, a fragrant in fact, mixture of tobacco, rotting wood and even furniture polish, in high demand by perfume makers because it prolongs a perfume’s scent. Roja Dove, the so-called King of Fragrance and one of the most knowledgeable people in the world when it comes to perfume, uses ambergris in a signature scent called Scandal Pour Homme that sells in luxury stores for $280 per 100ml bottle. Adrienne Beuse, the owner of one of the only international trader of raw ambergris in New Zeland, told Bloomberg Businesweek that it’s one of the few recession-proof commodities: “If I have the supply, I’ll always be able to sell it,” she said.
Alex Naysmith said that his son wants to use the money from his lucky find to build some kind of animal shelter. “He’s enjoying the attention he’s been getting, but I doubt it’ll last. He has a club in school that he started to look after animals, and would like to keep going with that.”
Asked what he thinks about the possibility of earning tens of thousands of dollars for a seemingly random rock find, Naysmith said that, although he’s been back to the beach to look for more, he “wouldn’t really mind either way.”
While possession of amberis is illegal in the U.S. since 1972 because it comes from endangerd sperm whales, Naysmith is free to sell the $60,000-plus valued substance.
All because a whale suffered some indigestion years ago.

loving couple

A story of a 104 year old man and his wife aged 100: they have been married for 81 years but have never taken a photo together as they are so poor.

These are their first photos together. The old lady dressed up in a wedding dress and old man was so happy, he hugged his wife and told her that she's so beautiful.