Monday, November 28, 2011
A week after arriving back home in the States, he wakes one morning to find his penis covered with bright green and purple spots.
Horrified, he immediately goes to see a doctor. The doctor, never having seen anything like this before, orders some tests and tells the man to return in two days for the results.
The man returns a couple of days later and the doctor says, I've got bad news for you, you've contracted Mongolian VD. It's very rare and almost unheard of here in the US, we know very little about it.
The man looks a little perplexed and says, „Well, give me a shot or something and fix me up, Doc.
The doctor answers, I'm sorry, there's no known cure. We're going to have to amputate your penis.
The man screams in horror, Absolutely not! I want a second opinion!!!
The doctor replies, Well, it's your choice. Go ahead, if you want but surgery is your only option.
The next day, the man seeks out a Chinese doctor, figuring that he'll know more about the disease.
The Chinese doctor examines his penis and proclaims, Ah, yes, Mongolian VD. veru rare disease.
The guy says to the doctor, Yeah, yeah, I already know that, but what can we do? My American doctor wants to cut off my penis!
The Chinese doctor shakes his head and laughs. Stupid American doctor, always want operate . Make more money that way. No need amputate!
Oh, thank God! the man exclaims.
Yes, says the Chinese doctor. Wait for two weeks. fall off by itself!
Monday, November 21, 2011
The first man gave him money..... the second one thanked him.....but the third one slapped the taxi driver.....
The taxi driver was stunned because he was hoping that none of them must have realized that the car didnâ€™t move an inch......so, he asked the third man: "what was that for?"
The third man replied: "control your speed next time......you got here so quick you almost killed us....."
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
1) 94% of men lie about their dick size. According to condom manufacturers, only 6% of men need to use extra large condoms.
2) The average man is 4-5 inches long when erect; no matter what you have heard ladies, that's the truth. Incidentally the average vaginal capacity is only 6 inches, for you women who think you can handle king dong.
3) 80% of American men are circumcised, though Pediatricists say it is not necessary.
4) No matter what all the ads say, nothing but time can make your penis grow. (most men reach the end of their growth by the early 20's)
5) There is no correlation between penis size and shoe size, hand size, or nose size.
6) Blue balls does exist! It's technically called 'prostatic congestion.'
7) Only 16% of men shave their privates
+Some stuff on the ladies+
------------ --------- ---------
1) Only 9% of women around the globe consider themselves 'attractive' (20% of British women do). 43% of women use the term 'natural', 24% say they have 'average' looks, 8% prefer the term 'feminine', 7% say they are 'good looking', and 7% say they are 'cute', and finally only 2% of women say they are 'sexy'.
2) An estimated 85% of women wear the wrong size bra.
3) 60% of women have had breast implants. (that's a lot !!)
4) 75% of women like giving/getting oral sex.
5) 95% of women shave their privates.
In The US
2) 70% of high schoolers have had sex before they have graduated. 27% loose their virginity senior prom night. Only 3% wait until marriage.
3) 95% of men would have sex with a girl after 1 month of dating. Only 10% of women feel this way.
4) Teens are most likely to have sex for the first time in JUNE.
5) First-time intercourse is often unplanned, meaning it's less likely teens will use contraception.
6) Virginity is often lost with a person they HAVEN'T been dating.
+5 Reasons Why Sex is Good+
------------ --------- --------- --------- ------
1) Masturbation is healthy for both men and women.
It is a good workout. It burns about 150 calories every half an hour. It will lower your cholesterol and improve breathing circulation.
2) You won't get sick. According to research if you have sex 1-2 times a week you are less likely to get sick.
3) You'll feel happier. You will feel a greater sense of well-being. Women who have more sex were clinically proven to be less depressed than women
Who don't have sex.
4) Makes you look better; problem is that ugly people don't get any. Sex releases hormones which make your skin and hair softer and shinier and tone your physique.
5) (The best reason) You will live longer. Studies prove that sex makes you live longer. Men who had sex 1-2 times a week had half the death rate as those who did not indulge themselves at least once a month. It also makes you look younger. If you have sex 3 times a week you may look up to 10 years younger than you really are.
1) Having sex 3 times a week for 1 year adds up to running 75 miles!!!!
Why are you waiting...?
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
She noticed a young man smiling at her she began feeling humiliated on account of her condition.
She changed her seat and he seemed more amused.
She moved again and then on her third move he burst out laughing
She had him arrested.
When the case came before the court, the young man was asked why he acted in such a manner.
His reply was: When the lady boarded the bus I couldn't help noticing she was pregnant.
She first sat under an advertisement,
Which read: 'Coming Soon: The Gold Dust Twins'.
I was even more amused when she changed her seat and went to sit under a shaving advertisement,
Which read: 'William's Stick Did The Trick'.
Then I could not control myself any longer when on the third move she sat under an advertisement,
Which read: 'Dunlop Rubber would have prevented this accident.'
And The case was dismissed... .....!!!
Monday, November 14, 2011
'I know,' the old man said. 'We were probably sitting here naked as a jaybird fifty years ago.'
'Well,' Granny snickered. 'Let's relive some old times.'
Where upon, the two stripped to the buff and sat down at the table.
'You know, honey,' the little old lady breathlessly replied,
'My nipples are as hot for you today as they were fifty years ago.'
'I wouldn't be surprised,' replied Grandpa.
'One's in your coffee and the other is in your oatmeal
Sunday, November 13, 2011
'If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and you shoot one of them, how many will be left?'
She calls on little Ralphy.
He replies, 'None, they will all fly away with the first gunshot.'
The teacher replies, 'The correct answer is 4, but I like your thinking.'
Then little RALPHY says,
'I have a question for YOU.
There are 3 women sitting on a bench having ice cream:
One is delicately licking the sides of the triple scoop of ice cream.
The second is gobbling down the top and sucking the cone.
The third is biting off the top of the ice cream.
Which one is married?'
The teacher, blushing a great deal, replied,
'Well, I suppose the one that's gobbled down the top and sucked the cone.'
To which Little RALPHY replied,
'The correct answer is 'the one with the wedding ring on,' but I like your thinking.'
Saturday, November 12, 2011
Watercress is called Sai Yeong Choy in Cantonese
UK Scientists say watercress is the new super food, able to prevent certain types of cancer. According to a study published this week in The British Journal of Nutrition, the consumption of a three ounce portion of watercress reduced the presence of a key tumor growth factor six and eight hours after eating the watercress in healthy patients who had previously been treated for breast cancer. The study was conducted by the Cancer Research Center at the School of Medicine, Southampton General Hospital in the United Kingdom. The study concluded watercress is as therapeutic as traditional drug treatments with tamoxifen and herceptin, commonly used chemotherapy drugs.
The study also said that through regular consumption, watercress "has the potential to confer valuable protection against cancer in general." "Watercress has the ability to turn off HIF1, a signal sent out by cells calling for blood supply," said noted aging scientist Dr. Nicholas Perricone. When HIF1 becomes incorrectly regulated, otherwise harmless precancerous clusters of cells have the opportunity to grow to form invasive tumors. "Scientists have been looking for anti-angiogenesis agents for years because if we can turn off the blood supply, we can kill the cancer," said Perricone. "And it looks like watercress can do that." Another study published in The! American Journal of Clinical Nutrition in February of 2007 showed that, in addition to reducing DNA damage, a daily dose of watercress increased the ability of cells to further resist DNA damage that may be caused by free radicals.
In the study, 60 men and women, half of whom were smokers, consumed their usual diet plus 85 grams of raw watercress daily for eight weeks. Blood samples were analyzed for plasma antioxidant status and DNA damage in lymphocytes, a type of white blood cell. Watercress consumption significantly reduced lymphocyte DNA damage. In the time of the Romans, Greeks and Persians watercress was used as a natural medicine, prescribed for migraines, anemia, eczema, kidney and liver disorder and tuberculosis.
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
On board India 's Most Expensive Train
It is considered to be the ultimate ride on rails. The Royale Indian Rail Tours offers one of the most
luxurious train journeys across India 's most beautiful locales. The Maharajas' Express is one of the six luxury trains in India that promises to offer the best in travel, traditional food and hospitality.
The fares for this luxurious travel range from Rs 212,000 ($4,725) for a single cabin to Rs 900,000 ($17,500) for the presidential suite for a 7-day trip on a 'classical journey'. The 'Classical India' tour (7 days/6 nights) starts from Delhi and passes through Agra , Gwalior , Khajuraho, Bandhavgarh, Varanasi , and Lucknow , before returning to Delhi .
For a 'Princely India' trip (8 days/7 nights), it costs Rs 243,000 ($5,400) for single accommodation, Rs 321,000 ($7,140) for double occupancy and Rs 900,000 ($17,500) for the presidential suite. This particular trip starts from Mumbai and passes through Vadodara, Udaipur , Jodhpur , Bikaner , Jaipur, Ranthambore, Agra , and finally ends at New Delhi .
The train criss-crosses through some of the most beautiful locales in the country offering a panoramic view of India 's countryside. The Royal India tour (8 days/7 nights) takes you from Delhi to Agra , Ranthambore, Jaipur, Bikaner , Jodhpur , Udaipur , Vadodara, before winding up at Mumbai.
The train chugs along the majestic ghats, deserts, lush green fields, scenic villages and rivers of western and north India .
The Maharaja Express redefines luxury travel with five-star hotel hospitality and high-tech modern amenities all along the journey.
The pan-India super luxury has a total of 23 coaches with a passenger capacity of 84. It has five deluxe cars each with four cabins, six junior suite cars with three cabins; two suite cars with two cabins each and finally the presidential suite that occupies an entire compartment. Every cabin has large panoramic windows, individual temperature controls, the first of its kind in India .
It also has LCD televisions, DVD players, direct dial telephone, electronic safe deposit box and internet facilities to make the journey an unforgettable experience.
The train is operated by Royale Indian Rail Tours Ltd (RIRTL), a joint venture between Cox and Kings ( India ) Ltd and Indian Railways Catering and Tourism Corporation (IRCTC).
A royal banquet for passengers, the Maharajas' Express has two fine dining restaurants that seat 42 persons at a time. Wine and beer are complimentary. A bar with the choicest collection of house wines also offers beer and spirits along with snacks that are complimentary for every passenger. There's also a lounge-cum-bar with comfortable club armchairs. The deluxe cabin is decked up in lavish style.
The Maharajas' Express also houses a high-end boutique, featuring exquisite and unique creations. The tour package includes guided train excursions at different places. The fare includes entrance fees at various sight seeing places, camera fee, transport and services of a guide, complimentary tea, coffee and mineral water on board and porterage at stations.
The Maharajas' Express is comprehensively insured for fire, earthquake, theft and terrorism. All guests are covered under an umbrella insurance cover.
Monday, November 7, 2011
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
Sediakan 20 helai daun sireh dan satu ounce kunyit dan keduanya diparut. Letakkan di atas penapis dan tuangkan air panas dan perah. Minum air yang sudah ditapis itu sebanyak satu gelas pada setiap hari.
Petua Untuk Memerahkan Pipi
Jangan buang terus hampas teh yang telah digunakan. Sapukan hampas teh tersebut ke muka terutama pada bahagian pipi. Biarkan selama 10 minit dan kemudian bilas. Amalkan selalu. Pipi anda akan merah tanpa memakai 'blusher'.
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
This is an excellent MUST SEE video. Very very short; but impacting! Read the short article first.
Be safe and consider sharing with your friends and loved ones... This is the first time I heard of this simple fire prevention idea... It's so simple and effective, that I'm forwarding it to all my family and friends. Kitchen Fire - Read first then watch
I was Executive Director of the Institute for Burn Medicine for San Diego and Imperial Counties when we lived in California . Besides raising the money to establish a Burn Treatment Center at the University Hospital there, I conducted extensive public education campaigns in Burn Prevention..
A friend recently sent me the attached short video - and like an old fire-horse, I heard the bell ring and am rushing to send this excellent prevention piece to each of you. It is well worth watching! And it could save your life.
This is very stunning - please read first and then watch the very short clip.
I never realized that a wet dishcloth can be a one size fits all lid to cover a fire in a pan!
This is a dramatic video (30-second, very short) about how to deal with a common kitchen fire oil in a frying pan. Read the following Introduction, then watch the show. It's a real eye-opener!!
At the Fire Fighting Training school they would demonstrate this with a deep fat fryer set on the fire field. An instructor would don a fire suit and using an 8 oz cup at the end of a 10-foot pole to toss water onto the grease fire.
The results got the attention of the students. The water, being heavier than oil, sinks to the bottom where it instantly becomes superheated. The explosive force of the steam blows the burning oil up and out. On the open field, it became a thirty foot high fireball that resembled a nuclear blast.
Inside the confines of a kitchen, the fire ball hits the ceiling and fills the entire room. Also, do not throw sugar or flour on a grease fire. One cup of either creates the explosive force of two sticks of dynamite.
This is a powerful message. watch the video and don't forget what you see.
Tell your whole family about this video. Or better yet, send this to them.